(Today’s my father’s birthday, and I really wanna write this entry for his birthday)
Basically I’m not the kind of person who can easily make friends. In other words, I’m a shy boy (you may laugh and say you don’t believe it, but it’s true :-P ). But lucky me, almost in every city that I ever lived in, I have friends that treat me like I were one of their own family. If you ask me the reason, I think that’s because I have a really great family back in Sidoarjo. (Well, actually I’d like to say that’s because I’m a fine, adorable, amusing person, plus any other wonderful adjective that I can find in dictionary :-), but I know that you won’t believe it anyway, so I just stick with the truth :-) ).
Here are two stories that made me believe so.
The first is a story from mas Sony, my sister’s friend. Mas Sony lived in Depok, the city where I went to take my bachelor degree. Since his house was close to where I lived, I often visited him on weekend, and he always welcomed me. There were lots of hawkers passed his house on weekend, and when I visited him, he used to stop two or three of them and bought me the foods, and he never let me pay. Like, he could buy me bubur ayam and bakso on one weekend, batagor, bakso, and es cendol on other weekend, and bakso and siomay on yet another weekend (if you good at learning pattern, you’ll realize that there’s always bakso (meatballs) in every weekend that I visit him :-) ). This made me wonder, not only why I still couldn’t gain weight even after all those feasts… :-), but also why he did that to me. Well, I was his guest, and it’s a normal custom for a host to treat his guest. But treating me two or three times in only several hours was a little too much. Then he told me his own story about that.
It was when he visited Sidoarjo and stayed in our house for several days. As a visitor, he wanted to try all Sidoarjo’s local foods. Almost everyday he ate them, either my mother cooked it at home, or my sisters brought him to some restaurants. My sisters never let him pay for everything that he had, just like what he did to me in Depok. One time he insisted to pay, but my sister refused and said,
“We’ll pay for you. But that’s not for free. You know, my brother is in Depok now. We will pay for everything while you’re staying here, so please never let my brother hungry during his stay there.”
And my sisters successfully ‘trapped’ mas Sony to treat me bakso every time I visit him… :-)
(And if you still wonder why bakso, there’s another story, but I want to keep it for my mother birthday… :-) )
The other story is when Yuki, my friend from Japan, visited my home. At that time she was studying bahasa Indonesia in Jogja. She told me once that she really wanted to know how it is like to live in a normal Indonesian family. That’s why when she heard that I was going to visit Indonesia for some conference, she asked me whether it’s okay for her to stay at my home for several days. My family didn’t mind at all, so I let her come.
While Yuki was curious about normal Indonesian family, my family was curious about her, since she was the first foreigner ever visit my home. The mutual curiosity seemed to work well :-), and in a short time she had already fitted there, just as if we had already known her for a long time. Everybody tried to make her stay as enjoyable as possible. Even when my brother and his wife planned a trip to Malang and asked the whole family to tag along, they also asked Yuki to join.
To make it short, we had a wonderful trip to Malang, and not long, it's time for her to go back to Jogja. She came to me and asked,
“So, how much should I pay for the Malang trip?”
My family (most of it my brother) paid for the whole trip, so I replied, “I didn’t pay at all, so I think you don’t need to pay either.”
She insisted, “That's not how it's work. You’re their family. It’s no problem if you don’t pay, but I’m nobody here.”
“You may think so, but I think they don’t expect you to pay. Don't worry about it.”
”C’mon!”
I thought for a while and then said, “Well, just put it this way. You don’t need to pay this time, but next time you visit my family again, bring something for them, okay? Just bring simple stuff, I’m sure they will appreciate it.”
Finally Yuki agreed with that.
Later, my father told me this about why he treated Yuki well.
“She really reminds me of you. Studying in a far country all alone without her family around her. Well, nothing we can do about you because Japan is beyond our reach, but we can do something for her here. It's not much, but I believe if we help her here, God will send someone else to take care of you for us there.”
And I believe that's why a lot of people taking care of me while I was away...
So, back to the title, to get yourself a treat while you’re away from home, you need to have a good family. Well, it's not something that you can do about, but at least you can be that 'good family' for your own family. Just try helping someone around you, and I think God will take care not only of your family, but also of you.
(Sorry for talking so big, but this advice is not only for you. Most of it is for me myself... :-) )
