Long Vacation

Been staying in the hospital for one week plus another week at home because of Chickenpox, but it's not what I mean with the vacation. It's also not about the fact that more than a year I hadn't wrote a new entry in this blog.

Well, it's longer than that, but I've just realized it when I get hospitalized. Chicken pox is very contagious, and I got my own room in the hospital, where I alone most of the time (well, the nurses sometimes came and I could talk with them). I must admit that it was sometimes boring, but what's good with it is that I got a lot of time to think.

This is the second time I've got hospitalized and I've just realized during that time alone in the hospital that I've changed after my first hospitalization. It seemed that after getting out of hospital, I always chasing something, always felt that I've been left behind (even my dream analysis showed that :-) ). Well, it might be due to the fact that I left school for several days and I think I had to catch up with what I've been missing, but that feeling linger, even after I finished my school and I started new course of live - where I'm actually not behind anymore. Well, sometimes the feeling is good, it motivates me to work faster, however it made me lost my attention to details, and even worst, made me cannot enjoy work anymore.

That's why this time I really took my time during my leave. I wasn't thinking about school at all (glad that my professor told me to really take rest :-) ). Even when Inako (one of my friends) visited me and asked me whether there is anything that she could bring me, I resisted the temptation to ask her to bring me my notebook (she finally brought me some magazine instead, great because I started to running out of idea what to think about to kill time :-) ). With that I hope that I can be fresh (and free from stress, if I may borrow Makii's words :-) ) when I return to school.

Now I've started going to school again, and I really hope that the normal 'me' had already returned from his vacation :-). Anyway, it's been a long break for him, and he should be fresh enough to start doing my work again :-).

お帰り！

Durian, A Story (Part 3): Can You Keep It a Secret?

Mochi that Pecolin gave me when we had Durian feast...
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This story actually occurred before the second part of the story, but I'd like to use this to close the trilogy (starwars? Indy Jones? :-) ).

Like I had mentioned before, I was ‘magnificiently’ successful in obtaining Durian this year, and without waiting until my room became Durian-scented, I brought it to Pecolin house. For a particular reason (that you'll also know after you read this through), I remember the date: it was May 14th.

Pecolin was surprised when I came, and indeed looked happier than usual. I often visit the family and she's always looks happy, but I never saw her grinned from ear to ear like that before. Even after I gave her the Durian, the smell couldn't erase the smile on her face (well, she likes Durian anyway, so it didn't count :-) ). Sonoyo was not there at that time, therefore we kept some for her and three of us had the Durian feast: me, Pecolin, and Otoosan (my home stay father. Otoosan literally means father. May be you will consider it strange that I call Pecolin by her name but call her husband 'father'). Anyway, the feast went without any accident. Pecolin likes Durian (so no problem with her), and even Otoosan who had never eaten Durian before had no problem to finish it (he even didn't need to rush for toothbrush after that :-) ).

Several days later I met Yoshimi. It looked like she had talked with Pecolin because she knew about the Durian feast.

"You know, she was very happy that you visit her last week."
"I can see that too." Pecolin ear-to-ear grin was still fresh in my mind. "She's always cheerful, but I never saw her so happy before. Was there any particular reason?"
"You didn't know it?"
I shocked my head.
"Do you still remember the date you visited her?"
"May 14th"
"You don't know what date it was, do you?"
I shocked my head again. ('Ear-to-ear grin' day? :-) )
"It's mother day! You know that she always considers you as her own son, and it was very meaningful for her when you visited her on Mother Day..."
Suddenly everything became clear.
"Actually I didn't know that it was Mother Day..."
"But still, she's very happy because of that..."

Well, should I tell Pecolin the truth, that it was just a coincident that I visited her on Mother Day? I didn't intended to lie to her, and if I keep it a secret from her, it wasn't a lie either, was it? As long as Pecolin herself doesn’t ask about it, I don't have the need to tell a lie, and everybody’s happy...

"Yoshimi, could you do me a favor? I hope you don't mind to keep it a secret from her? That I actually didn't know that it was Mother Day? I don't ask you to lie, just don't tell her about it. I think it's better to leave it that way..."
"Of course! Leave it on me."

May be someday Pecolin will find out about it anyway. Still, I think it is best to keep it a secret as long as possible. And if someday she finally finds it out, I hope at that time I had already had the chance to show her in other ways that I also consider her as my mother...

Anyway, several days later, I received a mail from Sonoyo. (Actually it has nothing to do with the 'Mother Day' stuff, but since this story started with I promised Sonoyo to find her Durian, I think it is better to close it with a mail from her).

アワンくん、こんばんは。先日はドリアンありがとうございました。初めて食べました。匂いは本当に強いですね。びっくりしました。(@_@)
味は匂いとは違っておいしかったです。主人は一口いただきましたが、ちょっと難しかったみたいです。私はたくさんいただきました。でも、日本人にとって、食べなれない味ですね。きっとアワンくんにいただかなかったら、生涯ドリアンを知ることはなかったかもしれない。
本当にありがとうございました。また会いましょう！

(Awan-kun, good night. Thanks for the Durian you gave us the other day. It was my first time to eat it. I was really surprised that it smells that strong.(@_@)
However, different from the smell, it tastes good. My husband could only eat a bit and it looked hard for him, but in contrary, I eat a lot. I think it is difficult for Japanese to eat it. May be if you never gave us the fruit, we will never eat it at all.
We really appreciate it. See you next time!)

In my reply I can only pray that her husband won't get any nightmare about Durian... :-)

Durian, A Story (Part 2): I Told You Not To Keep It Too Long in Your Refrigerator...

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One year from “Durian Candy” affair, and May came again. This time I carefully marked my agenda for the Thai Festival, and I was lucky enough not to forget it or happened to have other plans on those dates. It was raining, but I still took my time to go to Yoyogi park (where the festival held) for that crazy little fruit called Durian (well, not ‘little’, perhaps :-) ).

The ‘fragrance’ (I think my lab pals won’t agree with this wording :-) ) quickly guided me to the right spot, and without further ado I started to choose the fruits. Wondering how much Durian I should buy, I began to think to whom I would give the fruit besides Pecolin and Sonoyo. The remaining members of my lab who witnessed “Durian Candy Panic” episode were Kurata and Makii, and I think both of them would kill me if I still dared to bring the smelly object to the lab. I didn’t want to risk my chance to graduate from my lab by giving the fruit to my professor, either :-), thus the option to bring it to the lab was out of question. After short-listing candidates for my next ‘Durian victim’ :-), the (un)lucky :-) person was Aki. Hippo members are always a good choice on something like this, for most of them dare to try new things. And most of all, Aki sometimes invited me for a dinner, and I think this was one of the way to express gratitude (honestly, at that time I didn’t reckon that Aki might not consider it as a gift, but as a disaster :-) ).

Anyway, I mailed her to ask whether she liked Durian or not. She said that she never ate it before, but, as I had guessed it, would like to give a bite. She also offered a pasta dinner for the exchange of the fruit, and we set the date to the next Thursday.

Thursday came and I brought the Durian to her place. This time I had already came to my sense (?) and realized that she might not like it, thus I also brought Azuki ice cream with me, just in case. Like I often said before, Aki is a good chef, and even though it was only two of us, she cooked pasta that enough to feed 10 hungry persons (exaggerating :-) ). Anyway, we started to eat, and it was really delicious that we (We? May be it was only me :-) ) ate a lot. Finished with the dinner, we were about to proceed to the long awaited dessert (yes, Durian...), when Aki said: ”Can we skip the Durian tonight? I think I prefer the Azuki Ice Cream...”

Well, I had no problem at all with that, thus we proceed to the ice cream. I told Aki before I left not to keep the Durian too long in the refrigerator, because the ‘fragrance’ would spread out (The Durian was double sealed, but you could still smell it. Even in the train back home from Yoyogi park to my home I started to worry when I could feel the smell creeping out of my bag. Accidentally, I was taking Toyoko line, where around a decade ago the Sarin gas accident occurred. I started to wonder whether people around me who could smell the Durian suspected me as a member of strange religion which planned to do a mass suicide in the subway :-) ).

The following Saturday Yoshimi and Aki invited me for a sushi along with Chesda (a guy from Kampuchea) and Akane (another Hippo member). At that time Aki told me that she still kept the Durian in her refrig and that all her stuff there seemed to have turned to Durian (well, at least the smell :-) ).

“I told you not to keep it too long there”
“I know, but I don’t have the confidence to finish it all by myself. Can we all come to my home and help me finish it?”

Yoshimi and Akane seemed interested with the idea, and I would be surprised if Chesda didn’t like Durian (he’s a southeast asian!) so after the sushi we went to Aki’s place to do her the ‘favor’. To make it short, we opened the fruit, and one by one tried it. As I already guessed, they found that it was more delicious than they thought before, but learning from “Durian Candy” affair, I prepared for the worst: their reaction for the “after effect” (when only the smell left in the mouth).

Well, may be because I had prepared myself for it, their “after effect” reaction were not as bad as I predicted. Aki and Akane did race for toothbrush after eating (literally :-) ), but at least they said that they would have no problem with it if the smell was not that strong. Moreover, Yoshimi was doing fine (and not reached for mouthwash :-) ), and thus we finished the remained Durian together.

“Is there any other way to eat Durian beside eat directly like this?” Yoshimi asked when we about to finish the fruit.
“Well, sometimes I eat it as ice cream”
Yoshimi savored the Durian taste in her mouth. “I think it suit a vanilla ice cream. I’d like to give it a try”

Well, now I know what’s my “Durian project” for next year: to find Durian ice cream in Japan.
And since this time the result was not so bad, I think it’s not a bad idea to test it again to my lab pals...

Durian, A Story (Part 1): Candy Frenzy

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(I don’t like writing a long blog neither reading a long one, thus I cut this story into (hopefully :-) ) 3 parts - if I have the time and the mood to write them all...)

The story started close to the new year of 2005.

Like any other new year during my stay in Japan so far, my home stay family invited me to a party at their home. Agenda: eating, eating, eating, (eating?), playing cards, and chatting (I forget whether we ate three or four times that time :-) ). Sonoyo (the daughter), asked me what kind of fruit that I like when we had the dessert, and after thinking for a while I replied without any hesitation: “Durian”.

“Is it delicious? I never eat one.”

“Well, I like it. I even like the smell, though lots of people hate it. If I can find it, I can bring one next time if you want to.”

“Really? I’m looking forward for it.”

In the following month I searched Tokyo for Durian, and I couldn’t found one. I also missed Thai Festival that year, where I should have been able to find the fruit easily. Anyway, in April, my family told me that Tina, a friend of mine from my childhood, would visit Japan in May, and they asked whether I wanted something from Indonesia that she could carry with. The same reply as my answer to Sonoyo’s question (also with no hesitation) came out: “Durian”.

May came, and because it was hard to find Durian in Sidoarjo (my hometown) that time, Tina couldn’t bring me one. However, she brought Durian candies instead. It was in quite an amount that after gave some to Pecolin (my homestay mother), many still left. Then, along came the great idea: “Why don’t I give it to my lab mates?”

Durian reputation really precedes it, and only by mentioning that I brought Durian candy to the lab, little commotion occurred :-). One by one my lab mates turned down my offer to try the candy: Kahara just laughed, Kurata and Makii firmly said “no!” Anyway, finally I could find four volunteers that boldly eat what no one had eaten before :-) : my professor, Kim-san, Chou-san, and Yanagita. Similar replies came: it was more delicious than they thought before (I told you so!), but (still), the smell is strong. I was starting to feel glad that four of them like it, until we (they?) realized that there was a small problem (well, small for me, but may be not for them :-) ): unlike the actual fruit, the candy was made from the essence of Durian which has higher concentration, which meant that the taste would stay longer in your tongue. Chou-san didn’t mind about it, but my professor and Kim-san said that the taste leftover was too strong. Yanagita even complained that the taste wouldn’t go even after drinking two cups of coffee.

Another problem came from the smell. Although less than half of the members of my lab ate it, Durian smell spread throughout the room, and like a very aggressive salesman, it refused to go. Yanagita happened to eat it in the experiment room, and at that time no one couldn’t tell whether the smell came from the candy or from gas leaking.

Lessons learned: (1) each person has different perception on anything given to them (I still can’t believe that one can ever dislike something as good as Durian! :-) ). (2) Never eat Durian candy in closed room :-).

Nice to Meet You

Picture taken from party at my professor home, where I can meet (and 'meet' :-) ) not only the current member of my lab, but sometimes some alumni too...
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Again, about kanji.

You know that there’re several kanji in Japan that have the same pronunciation and the same English translation, but they give different nuance to the sentences? One of them (well, actually this is the only example that I know... :-) ) is kanji for the word au (あう), which English translation is ‘to meet’ and it can be written by several kanji (e.g. 会う, 逢う, 遭う). The ‘normal’ kanji is 会う, and I just happened to run across the other kanji (遭う) several days ago, thus I quickly asked Makii the difference between the kanji (you know one of the great things being a member of my laboratory? It is easy to find a free good Japanese teacher... :-). After reading this, I think Makii will charge me the next time I ask her about Japanese...).

Well, while the kanji 会う and 遭う are both read au, and both literally mean ‘to meet’, the usages are different. While the 会う kanji is normally used when you meet someone, the kanji 遭う is used when you meet danger or bad thing (e.g.盗難に遭う(tounan ni au), which means being robbed).

And it was not long when I finally had the chance to use it. Yanagita called me to have dinner together with Saito and Konishi, and when I mailed Makii about the news, here’s what I wrote: 「今夜柳田と遭う予定ですよ」(“I’m going to meet Yanagita tonight”).
(It’s just a joke. Actually, the kanji cannot be used if you want to say that you meet someone, even if you think he is dangerous).

The mail developed into a short chat. Makii wanted to ask me about something, and we then said that we’re going to meet in the lab. When closing the mail, she wrote: “I’m looking forward to meet you in the lab”. You can guess which ‘meet’ that is... :-).

Get Busy...

Well, the picture has no connection with this blog (as usual :-) ), but eating that indeed can help you forgetting something (for the time being...)
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Sorry if this time my writing is a little bit cryptic...

I was about to start my doctoral course when I took Nia’s offer to help in PIEF activities. And now that I found I’m getting busy in my lab (really? :-) ), it looks like PIEF will also claim some of my time soon. Anyway, I didn’t regret at all taking that decision. PIEF helps a lot of kids out there, and it’ll be great if I can help them, even only a bit. But most of all, it’s not others that I want to help by joining PIEF. It is more to me myself that I want to help. If I’m getting busy, may be I can try to get over someone... well, no, I don’t want to get over someone so special, it’s my feeling that I’m trying to forget. The feeling that I (might?) still want to keep, but I can feel that it starts consuming me, and bit by bit the parts of me are dying... (did I sound too poetic? :-) ).

Well, anyway, I just want to enshroud that feeling, and when eventually it comes to the time when it uncloaks itself again, I hope it already ‘the right time’ to let it blooms. Or if ‘the right time’ never comes, I hope it has already evolved that I can let it flow to someone else...

I’m just trying to be positive, and I really need to be positive. Like Yanagita often says that I’m an enthusiastic and positive type of person, I think it is time for me to live ‘that legend’, and not let it become just an empty reputation...

I Confess I Had Lived My Master Years

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I think I don’t need to tell you that if you’re enjoying something, the time will flash by like the wind. Well, it’s true. It feels like just yesterday that I attending the entrance ceremony for my masters course, taking pictures in front of fountain in sakura namiki (the fountain had already gone now), and being anxious about what lies ahead in two-year time; and suddenly, graduation day had passed.

Well, I won’t write much here, and if I’m to sum up all the things that happened these past two years, the words is fun, and a lot more fun. Of course some troubles also got in the way, but with those around me who have special knack to lift me up when I’m feeling down, and also those who’re far but keep on sending me their prayers, there’s only fine memories that come up anytime I recall those days.

I’m glad that God had let me live my master years to the fullest, even beyond what I had expected before; and now as I enter a new chapter of my life, I hope there’re still plenty of blesses that I would find along my endeavor...