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Question of The Decade, Part 2: Bride's Bouquet of Flower

Wednesday, June 25, 2008
(The words people said in this blog might be a little bit different from what they actually said, since besides they all spoke Japanese (and this blog is in English), I can't remember the exact words that they said. Anyway, the general story is okay, if my memory didn't fail me... :-) )

Yutaka and Miki got married this month, and they invited me to their wedding party. It was the first formal wedding party that I attended in Japan, and I worried that I would make mistakes (There are lots of trivial details in Japanese wedding such as the kind of envelope that you have to use when you present money to the couple, that even my Japanese friends have to consult their parents to get it right. Perhaps, even the parents need to consult their parents to get it right too :-) ). To avoid troubles, they told me to come with Akiko, their close friend. Akiko was actually the one who served as the cupid that introduced Yutaka to Miki :-), and for that reason they asked her to act as the MC for the party.

"If she's the MC, does it mean that she'll be busy most of the time?"
"We think so. But she doesn't have to come early, so you two can come together. I'll asked her about it."

It seemed that later Miki asked Akiko to contact me about the party. Akiko mailed me that her older sister would come with her boyfriend, so I could stay with the two while she is busy with her MC stuff. I was quite worried that I would disturb the couple's time together :-), but Akiko told me that she's sure that her sister wouldn't mind about it. So it was set. Now my only worry was that there would be loads of people who would asked me 'the question' at the party... :-) (Hey, it's a weeding party. What else do you think people would talk about there? :-) )

The day came, and the party started. Tomoko, Akiko's sister and her boyfriend were great companies. They even helped me by drinking my champagne during the cheers for the bride and the groom :-) (you know, I'm forbidden to drink liquor). The party went without problem, and I think it was a pleasant party indeed, since unlike what I've been afraid of, no one was asking 'the question' around. :-)

As we had thought, Akiko spent most of the time doing her role as MC. However, in between her job, she sometimes popped out in our place, stealing cakes from my plate :-).

Finally, it was the time for the bride to throw her bouquet. Akiko came to me, handed me her purse.

"Can you hold this for me? I wanna catch the bouquet, too."

I raised my eyebrows. "You're the MC right? Is it okay for you to go?"
"The bouquet catching is open for every single girl", she said, with a flash of nasty look in her eyes.
"Well, good luck! But the chance is one in a million, you know."
She laughed, and quickly darted beyond the balcony from where the bride
would throw the bouquet. Not long that Miki showed up in the balcony. She turned her back to the audience, and threw the bouquet over her head.

And I don't know where the statistic went, but what I said to be one in a million really happened :-). The bouquet headed right to Akiko, and without much effort she caught it. (Well, it's not one in a million actually. There were around 30 girls beyond the balcony, so the odds was one in thirty :-) ).


Tomoko's boyfriend who stood beside me turned at me and said, "Congratulation! Akiko caught the bouquet!"
I was about to ask why he congratulated me, when I realized that lots of people there must have thought that Akiko was my girlfriend. Anyway, I couldn't blame anyone for that, given that we came to the party together, and the fact that she stole cakes from my plate should have added to their suspicion :-). I was wondering whether I should say that we're just friend, when Akiko came showing her bouquet.
"I got it! Smell it! It smells really good!"
Akiko poked the bouquet to my nose, and all that I could sniff was the smell of grass.
"It smells like grass", I said honestly.

She raised her eyebrows and smelled the bouquet.
"What did you mean? It smells good."
I smelled the bouquet again, and no matter how hard I tried, I still couldn't scent the smell that she meant. If not for the MC job that she had to do, perhaps we'd spend the whole afternoon quarreling over the bouquet's smell :-). Anyway, she returned to do the MC, and the next agenda was lunch. There was 1 hour allocated for that, but since Akiko had other things to do, basically she only had less than 10 minutes to eat. I thought that she wouldn't have the time to take the food herself and that she'd bug me again like what she did in the morning :-), so I anticipated by piling foods on my plate (anyway, if she's not coming, I could finish it all by myself... :-) )
. Unfortunately, she did come to eat from my plate :-).

As we ate, the bouquet stuff came again to my mind. Some people believe that the person who catches bridal bouquet will soon follow the bride footstep, and I wonder whether Akiko wanted to get married soon. She's 23, and I don't know whether a girl of her age want to get married soon or not. So I asked her about that.
"I'm not planning to get married soon... why'd you ask?"
"You were running to the balcony as if Miki would throw 100 million yen there."
She laughed. "I don't believe in that superstition. I just think that it would be cool if I can catch the bouquet"
She then added while eating, "Of course, if there's a chance to marry, I will take it. But I don't want to put too much effort on it. Human relation is a thing to feel and enjoy, not to think and worry about. If I put too much effort to find that special someone, I think I won't be able to enjoy it."

A good reason indeed. I begin to wonder what's the reason that make people married, so when I had the chance to talk with Yutaka for a while, I asked his reason. Actually it was a simple reason:
"Well, we think that we can be happy together, so actually I and Miki planned to live together. However, Miki's parent didn't like about the idea. When I asked them whether they will allow me to marry her, they said it was okay, so I proposed her."

And he also offered me his groom's wisdom :-).

"Now that I got married, I won't tell you to follow me soon. It's your life, so it should be you who decide when you want to, and of course with who you want it to be done. But if you find someone that you really like and you think you can be happy spending your time with her, I think you should really consider the idea."

And I think I will take this wisdom of his. I won't wed just because I want
'the question' stopped from being asked to me. Even, for example, I finally get married and 'the question' be gone, other questions like "when will you have babies?" will come to replace. Those questions will naturally come one after another, and not a thing to worry about. I think the people who asked such questions are genuinely care about me, and all that they want is to wish happiness come upon me. Hearing lots of questions like that is actually the sign that people still care about me. The way to answer for their affection is to be happy, and do the thing that I think is best for me.

I
and Akiko went home from the party together, and besides quarreling about the bouquet (yes, it's still on :-) ), we talked about all kind of things. She was funny and I really enjoyed her company. She was planning to rent a DVD, and she asked whether I could recommend one good horror movie. It's quite hard to pick one, since she'd seen most of the horror movies on my list. We stopped at DVD rental shop, and after a small venture to the part where the semi-x-rated movie was on display (It was unintentional. I mistakenly read the floor map of the shop, and we were wondering why DVD of horror movie would need to feature a cover with people dressed so provocatively :-) ), finally I picked "IT" for her (glad she'd not seen it yet). I was planning to rent Michael Keaton's Batman for myself when she saw me browsing batman DVD and asked whether I like Batman. I said yes, and then she asked: "Do you know that the new batman movie will be on screen on August? Wanna watch it together?"

Well, it's just a date. We might keep our relation as friend, or the relation might grow stronger. I don't know. Anyway, I wouldn't ponder to much on it. Like she said in the party, human relation is something to feel and enjoy, not to worry about. I won't stock pain upon myself by thinking a lot
on what will happened next, I'll just let it goes naturally. She's a fine girl to have around, that's why I said I'd be glad to go with her. And for what's stored in the future for us, just let it be secret until it comes... :-)

("Question of The Decade" concludes here. I might find other interesting things to write related to the matrimony things, and at that time I think I'll use the title again)
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